Just a Hurdle

We had a great appointment with Dr. Beck today. I decided that I wanted the kids to come with Ryan and me so that they could meet my doctor and see where mom was going when she goes to chemo. I'm so glad they got to come. They got to see the chairs that I will sit in and ask the doctor some questions.

Dr. Beck seemed so much more relaxed this visit. She said now we have all the test back she has more definitive answers for us. I will need 3 to 4 rounds of chemo....not 9!!! I am so excited!!! That means instead of 6 months, I will be done in 2:)!!! YEA!!! She then said that this is a curable cancer and that I have an 80% chance of beating this:) Could this day have been any better?!?

I did ask her why wouldn't I be able to beat this (the 20% chance). She said that once in a while someone doesn't respond to the treatment and the cancer just keeps mutating. But she sees no reason why I would fall into that category. I am young and healthy.

But cute little Skyler...amazing how smart they get....he asks her, "Well, what happens if her body doesn't respond?" I love that Dr. Beck looked at him and said, "Then we will find different medicines to give her until we find one that works." Skyler then asks, "What is chemotherapy." She responds,"it is medicine that we put into an iv and put in her arm and the medicine then goes into her body." She was so great with Skyler.

Nathan asked her when would my hair grow back. She told him that it will start to grow back as soon as chemotherapy stops, but that it will take a little while. But eventually it will look just the way it does today.

I truly appreciated her kindness and patience with my kids. I think it help them to feel a little more involved and not such a mystery anymore. They will be able to picture where I am and what I am doing while they are at school. Plus if I only need 3 rounds....oh man....I'll be done before summer really starts.

She did say that I will need radiation therapy, but that is much less intense than the chemo. I'm not too sure how long that will last, I have to get an appointment with that doctor to discuss that issue.

An interesting little tidbit was that I am not allowed to have vitamins during chemo. She said it can interfere with the medicine and that she would let me know when I am able to take them.

Honestly with this new information I feel so much more relaxed....I was dreading 6 months, but I can handle 2. My sister sent me this thought and this is how I feel right now:

"In the 100-meter hurdles race, runners must jump over hurdles placed in their path. The hurdles are not there so that a runner will come to them and stop and, discouraged, go back to the starting line. They are not there to make him crash. The beauty and excitement of this race is to jump over the hurdles, to overcome the obstacles.

If we understand the importance of obstacles in our individual lives, we begin to see them in a positive light as true challenges to overcome."

(Horacio A. Tenorio....Ensign, May 1990)

This is how I feel tonight. That this is a hurdle in my way on the path of my life...and I will jump this and move on:)